Channel: Prof. Sam Vaknin

Category: People & Blogs

Tags: shameabusedelusionindifferenceadvicenarcissistfalse selfintimate partnerpsychotherapybetrayaltrue selfshared fantasyrelationshipshealingmotherself awarenessromanticno contactpsychopathsgrandiosityboundariesnarcissistic personality disordercommunicationpersonality disordersfearneedstraumaguiltempathypainnpdfantasytherapynarcissistic supplysexbackground noiseisolationcheatingborderlinehelpantisocialdefencesselfnarcissismhurtchild

Description: How To Love the Narcissist AND Keep Him or Her? Two opposing strategies: 1. Be like his dead mother: cold, rejecting, selfish, absent, unsafe (triangulate, cheat, betray), approach-avoidant, fake. This leads to the narcissist trauma bonding with you in order to reenact early childhood conflicts and results in devaluation, discard, and replacement (separation-individuation) and then hoovering (if no mortification is incurred). 2. Be the opposite of his mother: conform to the snapshot. Cope with Abuse: Background Noise Technique: youtube.com/watch?v=Auz0f8jYfiY If You Love a Narcissist, This is For You: youtube.com/watch?v=uo74QE3Le5o Act as “background noise”: ask no questions, never criticize or disagree, when addressed confine your response to the issues broached and do not introduce new topics into the conversation. In short: never initiate or be proactive – always react meekly, compliantly, and subserviently. Find and Buy MOST of my BOOKS and eBOOKS in my Amazon Store: amazon.com/stores/page/60F8EC8A-5812-4007-9F2C-DFA02EA713B3